Picked Last, But Not Anymore

When I was a kid, I was almost always picked last. I probably wasn't literally the last one standing every time, but it felt that way. I wasn’t the first name called for the kickball team or chosen right away for Red Rover. I had a lot of friends, sure, but I was rarely "the" friend. You know, the one people couldn’t wait to sit by, call first, or invite over. I felt like an option, not a priority. Disposable, even.

It’s funny how those small moments, the ones we think shouldn’t matter, find a way to shape us. Not being picked can settle into your bones. It can become a quiet voice that whispers, You’re not enough or You don’t belong. And even as an adult, that feeling can linger. I’ve felt invisible, even when I’ve done everything to be seen. I’ve spoken loud and still not felt heard.

But here’s the thing, I’ve been working on it. Becoming aware of how that old pain still tries to show up in my present has been powerful. And starting my own business, that cracked everything open in the best and hardest ways.

Being a life coach, stepping into entrepreneurship, it forced me to stop waiting to be picked. I picked myself. I built something from the ground up, something real, something valuable. And along the way, I found strengths I didn’t know I had. I’ve felt my confidence bloom. I’ve tackled tough conversations I used to avoid. I’ve stopped shrinking. I’ve started showing up as my full self, unapologetically.

I feel stronger. More beautiful. More joyful. I laugh more. I notice the good in people, even when life is hard. I’m meeting new faces and building connections that feel real. And more importantly, I’ve started seeing me. Not the kid waiting on the sidelines, but the adult standing in her own light.

Growth does that. It changes the way you see yourself. It doesn’t always feel safe, it’s exciting and scary all at once , but it’s worth it. Every stretch, every doubt, every leap of faith has led me to this moment.

I may not have been picked first then, but I’m picking myself now, over and over again.